My kids first day at school

School is vital in our children’s everyday lives. It has become a routine for every parent and child. School means quality education and a good life, according to many elders. Basic Education is essential for everyone to lead a day-to-day life. Nowadays, due to a boost in technology and science, education has become the priority of our lives.  Nowadays, even elders are learning continuously every year to know more about the job or business they do. Or to become more successful or to make a good professional CV. Learning is important and I also believe in learning throughout our lives to gain more knowledge and grow with society. 

But Early education is not necessary for your children especially when they are just 1.5 or 2 to 3 years old. I am telling this because I have seen many parents sending their 1.5-year-old children to playschools, daycares, and nurseries. This is happening as both parents are working full-time jobs and are not able to give time to their toddlers. According to me, You should not send your kid to any school before 5 years of age. They should be with you all the time and learn so many things with you to be ready to face the outside world or when they go to an outside environment like schools, daycares, and nurseries.  Even science tells the same. Many Western countries today have strict rules regarding the age of the child when they are admitted to schools. Many schools offer education to children above the age of 5 years. In the Gulf, the recommended age to get admission to schools is very good. But in our country, we parents send our children to playschools at the age of 1.5 years, nursery at the age of 2.5 years, LKG at the age of 3.5 years, and UKG at the age of 4.5 years.

Since both parents are working today, they can’t be at home 24/7 and take care of their toddlers by leaving work. Thashwy they send their kids to daycares or playschools. But according to me, any one parent has to be with the child at home for at least 4 to 5 years. If you work from home then that is good. If you have your own business or do a part-time job that is also cool. You can take time out for your child by doing these kinds of jobs. This will connect you more with the child and you both can create a great bond with each other. Children who are with their parents most of the time at a very young age, tend to become more smart and intelligent.  And trust me, every parent is going to enjoy this wonderful phase of being with the kid. Their small milestones will make you happy and you start understanding them better. Kids also become more comfortable with their parents in the future. 

The education structure of the schools nowadays is very good because they don’t teach only the alphabet and numbers to the kids in preschools and nurseries. They do many fun activities, play indoor games, and outdoor games, teach religious importance, teach culture,  and help children with communication and social skills. By keeping all this in mind we also admitted our 3-year-old child to nursery. Because our kid was a little shy and his communication skills were very poor. So as parents, we thought if he goes to school, he will get new friends, a new environment, new activities, and develop social and communication skills. But this was the worst decision of our life. It made my child suffer a lot and I still regret it. In this article, I will tell you what happened with my kid and how he overcame all the problems. 

Disadvantages of sending your kid early to school:-

• Kids develop more separation anxiety.
• They will face difficulty in communicating as their communication skills are not fully developed.
• Their motor skills are also not fully developed so they might not be able to write or cut papers with scissors properly.
• They easily become frustrated or cry a lot when they have to go to school.
• They may not get more family time.
• They may become silent or feel fussy all the time.
• They may develop recurrent viral fevers due to low immunity. 
• Some kids may also start hating their parents for sending them to a place that they don’t like. 
• They may not have enough time to play at home or with neighborhood friends. 
• They become stressed very easily.
• They may be unable to eat breakfast properly because of school timings.
• They may not get enough sleep at night. 
• They may not get enough time to be creative and innovative with their play when they are not at home. Kids who play alone try so many new ways to keep themselves busy. 

Some advantages of sending your child early to school:-

• Your kid may develop social skills by interacting with other kids and teachers.
• They may also develop communication skills by learning from their friends.
• They will learn to follow a routine of sleeping on time, eating on time, and going to school on time. 
• They may make new friends at school.
• They will learn to share and adjust to a new environment.
• They may learn new games, fun activities, and writing. 
• It’s a huge relief for parents who are working 9 to 5 jobs. They can start their career early by sending their kids to schools. 
• Kids become independent very early by watching other kids. 
• Kids build confidence at an early age. 

All these advantages and disadvantages depend on the right school that you choose for your kid. School plays a very important role in your kid’s development. So please do a lot of research before taking admission in any school. The school should be near to your home, they should maintain a good hygiene system, there must be less number of students in class, The classrooms should have big windows for ventilation, and the teachers should focus more on fun activities and interacting with kids instead of just making them read and write letters and alphabets. There should be 2 teachers in one classroom to take of every kid. The school should give regular updates on how your kid is performing in class. Nowadays many schools send videos and photos of our kids or the classroom to know what they are doing in the class. 

My personal experience with my kid:-

My son was 3 years old when we first admitted him to school in nursery class. Before that, we didn’t even think of sending him to playschool or daycare as he was a very active and smart boy. And I stayed at home to take care of him without working. After 2.5 years, he stopped communicating and played on his own. He didn’t even listen to us when we called him by his name. He was always busy playing with something or the other. And he liked to play alone or with me. He didn’t like to pay with other kids or with other family members. The children in the park too didn’t interact with me and everybody was busy with their things. Since we lived in a nuclear family and he didn’t have any siblings at that time, he was not able to interact with other people. It felt very bad to me when I saw him paying alone or just following me everywhere in the house. So we decided to send him to school.  We searched for many pre-schools online and by visiting our nearest schools. We were late for the admission as the academic year already started 3 months ago when we started looking for schools. But still, some schools were taking admission.  Since he was 3 years old, the school staff decided to send him to nursery class. There was no assessment test since he was very small. We completed the admission process and the principal told us to start coming the next week. 

The school timings for nursery kids were from 8.15 am to 12.45 am. There was a snack break of half an hour in between. My kid’s sleeping routine was a bit different. He slept at 10.30 pm and woke up at 8.30 am. So it became difficult for me to wake him up at 7.15 am and get him ready for school. The first he was very excited about school. Because he saw so many animated school cartoons, he bought a new school bag, lunch box, pencil box, and a new water bottle. Even after going to school, he was getting excited. But as soon as the teacher took him into his classroom, he was continuously looking at us. He thought we would also come into the classroom and be with him the whole day. When he saw us not coming inside, he ran towards us and caught my hand. I explained to him so much that we could not come inside and we would stay here till school time was over. But that school didn’t allow any parents to stay there at school even on the first day. They told us that we could come early at 11.45 am to pick up the child. He cried a lot after I let him go of my hand. By watching him cry, I cried a lot after coming home. I don’t know about fathers, but mothers get very emotional with their children. You will feel like you are a very bad parent and sending them to school early is a mistake. I also felt the same and called my friends and family members for support. I was thinking about how will my child get support in that classroom when he is feeling lonely and stressed. Because everything there was new to him and none of his family members was there to support him. I felt very disheartened. The next day went the same. He cried and vomited at the main gate of the school not letting me go. This continued for one week. The teacher told me that my child was continuously crying for 3 hours and didn’t eat or drink anything. When I asked other parents about their experience they also told me that it takes at least 1 to 2 weeks for a child to settle completely in school. 

After one week he got viral fever along with a cold and cough. It went away on its own after 4 days of giving medicine. He went to school on the fifth day. He was still not happy or excited about going to school. He stopped talking again and stayed quiet and calm most of the time. Before he was a very happy baby and used to smile always but nowadays he stopped smiling and started playing and talking to himself. His school teacher also complained that he is not active in class and doesn’t respond to any questions or play games with other kids. He just liked to hear rhymes and hear stories. I was very eagerly waiting to see him happy again and completely settled down in the school environment but this never happened again. After 2 weeks, he again got a viral fever. We treated him at home with medicines and he got cured. The next month, he got a fever again and this happened every month. He used to get a fever every 20 to 30 days. And cold and cough in between. This continued for the last 6 months. We visited every doctor but there was no solution to this recurrent fever. my parents told me to stop his school as he was frequently falling ill when he started going to school. But we were not ready as we already paid the full term fees. I have written a detailed article on the topic of recurrent fever in kids and how my kid overcame it. You can check out this link. Recurrent fever in kids. 

Since he was sick most of the time, he missed so many classes in school. When we went to the last parent-teacher meeting, the teacher complained that my kid only come for 15 days to school for the last 3 months. I explained to her about his health condition and she understood. I told her that he was fine now and this won’t happen again. But after this, something terrible happened in our lives. My son got typhoid fever for 2 times continuously and once he got cured from typhoid he got dengue fever along with me. At that time I was 6 months pregnant and was admitted to hospital due to dengue fever. Right after my discharge, he got dengue and was admitted to the hospital for 3 days. Every time those memories come to my mind, I go blank and tears roll down my eyes. It is very difficult for a parent to see their children suffer right in front of other eyes. I have written another article on dengue in kids and how we treated it. Please read this article. Dengue in kids. 

After all this, we stopped his school. Because we also started believing that our son felt sick every time he went to school. We moved to our parent’s home as my delivery date was also near. We stayed there for at least 6 months and my son started recovering from his illness slowly. He gained his immunity and was much better than before. The next year when he turned 3.5, we admitted him to another school in LKG class. This time we searched for a school that had good hygiene and ventilated classrooms. The fees of this school were a bit high but it had all the facilities. Now, since my kid became a little big, he didn’t cry on his first day of school. He just felt a bit sad and went inside the classroom on his own. He said bye to us with a teary eye. I told him that I would come back early and would bring his favorite candy. He smiled and went inside. For the first week, he was a little calm. But after one week, he started laying with other kids and making noise in the classroom. This time the teacher complained that my son was the naughty boy in the classroom and didn’t learn anything. He doesn’t know how to write numbers and alphabets which will impact his academics and will not be able to pass LKG. But I was feeling happy because it was a great transition for my child from being very quiet to becoming the naygh boy in class. For his writing and reading skills, I bought books online and started teaching him daily for one hour after school. Developing kids writing skills at home. 

This academic year was good for both my kid and us. He was happy and healthy than before. But still, he used to get viral fevers, colds, coughs, conjunctivitis in the eyes, and bacterial infections. Kids younger than 5 years have very less immunity and thatswhy they catch viruses and bacteria very easily. No matter how hard you try to keep them away from all these diseases, you cannot stop those viruses from entering your kid’s body. Somehow, my kid finished his LKG class and we moved to Dubai. In Dubai, the school admissions were based on the kid’s age, and my kid was not eligible for UKG or Kindergarten 2 class as he was 4.8 years old at that time and the right age for admission in LKG class was 5 years old.  So that whole year he didn’t go to school and this was the time when miracles happened. 

Since he was at home, I made him study and practice all the alphabet and numbers. He improved his communication skills by talking to me and his younger sister. He was very happy and loved being at home. I took him to the park twice or thrice a week. There he met with other kids and played with them. He started helping me with my household work. He folded the clothes, swept the floor, cleaned the house, kept all his books and toys neatly, and took care of his sister. Within 3 months, he learned all the alphabet and numbers. He was able to write all of them on his own very neatly in the book. He learned many rhymes and religious poems. He became confident and started questioning me about everything. He learned to draw different objects and loved painting. He used to create new models of toys with some household materials and his innovative skills were developing very fast. His immunity was very good and he didn’t get any fever or cold for the whole year!!!!!. Isn’t this shocking to you? He started his schooling again after one year in UKG class when he was 5.5 years old. This is when I realized that kids should not be sent to school before 5 years of age. This is the phase when your kid needs you the most and is completely dependent on you for each and everything. If you support him at this time, he will be ready to face the outside world or any tough situation that comes in his life. 

Conclusion:-

I realized all this when my child suffered a lot. I don’t want this to happen to any of you. Thatswhy I am sharing this with you. If I am wrong you can correct me through comments and if I am right please give a like. Every kid is different and some children show more confidence and independence when going to school. Some like to play with other kids and develop social and communication skills very fast. Kids like this are suitable for early schools or pre-schools at a young age if you want them to go to school. As parents, you know what’s best for your child. Still, a kid’s immunity at this age will be very low and if you are planning to send your kid to school, then you should be ready to face health issues or frequent fevers in your kids. My second daughter falls in this category. She is just 2 years old and is overconfident, intelligent, independent, and not at all shy. She likes to meet new people, interact with family members, play with other kids, communicate like an adult, eat on her own at a very early age, express feelings and needs, and enjoy being herself and with her elder brother. But still, we decided to send her to school only after she turned 5 years old as we already faced so many health issues with our first child after sending him to school.